With about a month left of training for my first ever competition I’m randomly freaking out. For whatever reason my nerves are taking over and making me believe the following:
1. I’m not good enough to be doing competitions. Period.
2. I signed up for a division above my abilities and when I’m nervous it’ll be impossible.
3. I’m going to get smoked. Like in a humiliating way.
4. Every WOD will include squat snatch.
5. I will ultimately forget one piece of equipment/gear I really need and it makes me have a break down in public.
6. I freeze and forget the WOD as I’m doing it.
Deep down i know these are all irrational fears. But i can’t help but go through the what ifs on the negative side.
So since i can’t erase my fears right now as i have no clue what will happen in September I’m going to force myself to think about the positive what ifs since it seems healthy:
1. I registered for a division well within my abilities. It will be challenging but it won’t be impossible at all. Here are the division qualifications for the comp. I signed up for the Women’s Pack division:
2. I’ve been training everything so even if squat snatch is in every WOD I am capable of doing it.
3. There will be women faster than me. There will be women slower than me. And if I finish last, at least I’ll finish! My goal of this comp is to do my best, not win (winning would be nice though)
4. I know even if I forget something, which is highly unlikely due to my perfectionist list making, someone will probably let me borrow some of whatever it is or that i can still compete without it (unless it’s pants…that might actually prohibit me)
5. I won’t have a public breakdown. Bathrooms are private, right? No seriously, though, I’m not that crazy.
6. If i forget the WOD I’m doing I’m sure the judge will help me. But again, I’m going to be so hyped up i doubt that’ll be an issue.
Deep breath. I can do this! I’ll have my cheering squad there helping me out and screaming for me to keep going. I’ll have more than I need in equipment/gear and i know another month of training will get rid of some of my nerves.
Now if only i could tame the butterflies in my stomach…